Hello everyone. I am back once again after missing for so long. This is actually a good news, which means I am busying building my future. Cause whatever you do today will always make what u will be in the future. Last post was 2 months ago. But I will promise you guys juicy pics  and content in this post. New year, new start, new beginning. Lets make this year a RAWR~! not a MEOW..

First of all, Niki’s BM promotion.

It was my first time fighting along with the team to help someone get promoted. It was a priceless experience. Everytime we talk about challenges, obstacles, teamwork, the sense of satisfaction after a victory.. How many times in your life do you actually encounter this? For me, only when I was gaming in the past or during the days in army. I never expect myself to experience this again after I quit gaming. Let to say in work or in life..

The thirst of hunger, the feeling of victory is something that hooks me up to crave for this kind of feeling. Credits to the whole team for making it happen. Seeing everyone helping each other, seeing who you can rely on when you really need them. And I believe this also strengthen the bond we had before.

From this promotion, Phoenix Advisor was borned. I was given this title which I like it alot. It doesn’t matter what kind of title I receive, but rather the things I have done is always being recognized in this industry. I have seen many other people stepping up as well. People like Alfrey especially. It was an opportunity to make use of our strength to help one another, an opportunity which you have to grab it.

After the promotion, there was this hype going around. Best influencer, Phoenix Advisor blah blah blah. Sometimes humans tend to feel comfortable with things too long that they became complacent or stagnant. I admit I was a victim of it. My performance slumped, I became so complacent that I started to take things for granted. Almost everyone in the team were all in celebration mood. Our results slumped.. everyone was like a titanic filled with water.. slowly sinking into the sea.

Joval Gan’s words hit me hard in my head. I am not sure about the others. “If you think everything is over, let me tell you guys this. This is just the beginning. The game is not over yet”

I am glad that we pulled it through and currently everyone is back to its best.

Appco Rally 2010

This is my first time I went to a Rally. I have always heard of it since the first day I join the company. It was held at KL, Putrajaya (hope I spell correctly). This convention hall is where Malaysia ministers hold their meeting, and I am so glad to have a chance going to such place. It was an eye opening experience. The convention hall itself is so gigantic that it can hold up to 3000 people. We have people from Philippines, Thailand, Malaysia, Hong Kong, Indonesia, VPs from UK to attend this Rally.

And of coz, my aim to go Rally is not only see see look look. But also there to collect my awards. It was my first Rally and I have achieved the Sales Achievement medal. On addition, I also got the Best Marketing Office of the year medal due to the hardwork everyone has put in. It was a deserved achievement in my opinion, especially Joval has done so much for everyone.

I feel that one of the attribute I possessed is to make use of every situation I face, turning it into an advantage for myself. Regardless if its something good or bad, I will somehow learn valuable lessons from it by self-reflecting. During the Rally, Adlynn came to me and told me something. “Last Rally, I only have 1 award and 1 guy in my team. Now I have 4 awards and 5 guys.” Adlynn is someone whom I give lots of respect and a figure in the company which many look up on. There must be a reason why she is saying this to me, maybe I am thinking too much maybe not. But for me, I am an ambitious person. If I am in the same situation as what she is in her previous Rally, it means I must get 4 awards with 5 guys in my team at least in the next Rally to match her. And the word “must” will begin with myself from the actions I do now. I see this as a self motivation.

Chinese New Year 2010

Chinese New Year is always the occasion I am looking forward to. However this year, the feeling is not there. Is it because as we grow older, we tend to lose the interest in enjoying the festive season? Or is it that everyone around you changed so much that the feeling is not there anymore? Or is it only me who feels this way as slowly we changed into a different person with different thinking?

It was a mental challenging occasion for me this time. Especially after joining the company, I tend to look at things, look at people with other perspective. First of all, I don’t feel the love between friends like how we had in the past. Secondly, I am facing debt problems which I know I am taking it too long to clear it, thus affecting a friendship to turn sour and people look at my differently. Thirdly, I faced distractions and negatives that affected my work. And lastly, I found the person whom I think I am looking for all these while.

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This Chinese New Year, I see some difference in my group of friends. In the past, there were alot of “get along” sessions whereby we will ask each other about current situations. It is not about the “get along” sessions but rather the care and concern everyone show each other. This time, it was more of a gambling session than the usual gathering. I understand that it is normal to gamble during Chinese New Year but this time round, its like everyone is there for the sake of gambling. Still, there is some chat around but its not as many as compare to the past.

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I am also glad that I have cleared alot of my debts this Chinese New Year, but at the same time the debts often overwhelm me because of the amount, the different people I need to clear and the job I am doing pays me irregularly due to my performance .  I always have this principle of being grateful to those that helped me and I will do something to repay them in the future. It will be my task to build this soured friendship back when I finally free myself from the financial burden I am facing, at the same time I can understand why is this person feeling like this and his actions. I am guilty of it because it was my wrong doing in the past which result in today’s awful scenario. I have no regrets over it and will be responsible for everything.

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In my job industry, we always face rejections, face negatives spread from friends and relatives. Because these people around us are skeptical, and don’t understand from the surface they see. These people didn’t even make the effort to understand, neither do they give us a chance to sell our idea of the industry. I don’t blame them. These are the group of people who are always following people’s trail, which eventually are the easier path as compare to create their own trail. Whether they will end up being filthy rich or end up like the normal typical Singaporeans is still a question mark. One thing for sure is that it doesn’t bother me whether what happens to these people, as they are so afraid to take risk, having a fear in them to face failure, and being selfish by saying things according to their own feelings without thinking for others and especially they just have to mind their own business. I always thought I have a strong resistance but I was wrong. The negatives did affected me during the period when my shield was thin. But it was the trust and faith I have in this industry, the belief I have in the people I am working with around me that picked me back from this pitfall. End of the day it is about the mindset, the mentality. I am glad that everything is over and I am looking forward again to build my future. This is one of the dangerous period especially after the promotion, after the Rally, after all the holidays and breaks. It will be something for me to share with others in the future so that we will take precaution.

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One of my greatest weakness in me is about LOVE. I knew this weakness of mine many years ago as I am always badly affected. Me who faced all kinds of shit, including death in the past equipped me with what I am today. I am not afraid of anything but when it comes to LOVE, this thing can easily slice me through like a knife and butter. After few years, I finally found myself liking someone again. It was suppose to be a good news but on other part, “seems” to be a good news. This person I like is someone I think I have been looking for all these years, but because of the situation I am having now, I am afraid to commit, afraid to enter courtship, afraid to enter a relationship, afraid that it will affect my work, afraid to face rejection, afraid that I might not give her happiness, afraid to bend the rules in my work industry.

This person has all the attributes of the ideal girl I am looking for. In terms of size, skincolor, character, personalities, communication, age, hobbies, talents, style, sense, and the feeling of being so comfortable whenever she is around. Most importantly, the fact that I have moved on from my previous heartbreaking relationship after so long. Many times we come across situations where we don’t really know whether to follow our heart or follow our head. Many times we come across times when we feel that we deserve a chance but not given any. Question is.. this time round should I follow my heart or follow my head? Will I get a chance to know you more? Will I have a chance to let you know more about me? Will you give yourself and give us a chance?

I am a person who is very serious when it comes to relationship, a person who is willing to give my 100%. When I enter a relationship, I see my partner as someone I am going to settle down with. I don’t have many girlfriends in the past, neither am I a person who often fall in love. This time, it is such a tough decision because this girl just pass by, entered my life. And I know if I don’t do anything about it, it will just slip away like that. It is a rare opportunity and I know this don’t come often. Things are so complicating and contridicting that I know the chance is so slim for us to be together if I get to see her. On another part, there will be a higher chance to be together if I don’t get to see her, unless I make up my mind and go for it.

Life is like a lost and found counter. When you thought you found it, you have lost it.